--- title: I'm Rubber You're Glue...Confrontation in the Workplace description: Tips and hints on how to navigate your way through conflict in the workplace for those who struggle when confronted. --- [![Progress-Coaching-Logo-not-tag-white-249px-x-56-1](https://www.salesprogress.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Imported%20images/Progress-Coaching-Logo-not-tag-white-249px-x-56-1.png?width=249&height=56&name=Progress-Coaching-Logo-not-tag-white-249px-x-56-1.png "Progress-Coaching-Logo-not-tag-white-249px-x-56-1")](https://www.salesprogress.com) ## ![blog-header](https://www.salesprogress.com/hs-fs/hubfs/ProgressCoaching/blog-header.png?width=256&name=blog-header.png) ## The Progress Coaching Blog ## I'm Rubber You're Glue...Confrontation in the Workplace March 23, 2012 Posted by : [Codie Lynn Thompson](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/author/codie-lynn-thompson) [0 comment](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/bid/84359/I-m-Rubber-You-re-Glue-Confrontation-in-the-Workplace#comment-listing) [coaching](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/topic/coaching), [Employee Development](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/topic/employee-development), [Training](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/topic/training) ###  *** I'm Rubber Your Glue...Confrontation in the Workplace*** It is painful for me to admit, but my aptitude for navigating stressful situations hasn’t seemed to evolve past my prehistoric sisters. When faced with confrontation, I have two go-to responses, fight or flight and I seemingly have no control over which one wins the internal battle. Now, if I found myself faced with the threat of a saber-tooth mauling, I’d be ok with this; but, when it come to taking on your average workplace conflict, blind, instinctual action has not worked well for me. I have always been the person that finds herself in a conflict and responds with silence and the first exit out or irrational, obscene screaming. Either way, I ultimately regret what I did or did not say and end up stewing over the incident until I finally come up with a perfect comeback. These comebacks usually consist of a totally sane, rational message based on true facts and actual events, wrapped in a flawless delivery that exudes both grace and confidence as to convey that I am calm and collected but I still mean business. However, it is always thought up in vain because naturally my stroke of genius doesn’t hit me until days after the incident and saying any of it then would make me look far more insane than my initial reaction did. Now, whether you can sympathize with my primitive conflict management skills or you have opposable thumb, walk upright and haven’t found this post to be anything but humorous, the fact is, the fight-or-flight response originated with the caveman because stressful confrontation has been around since the dawn of man. With a consistency record of forty thousand years, give-or-take, I think it’s safe to assume avoiding conflict and confrontation for the rest of my life isn’t going to suffice. So, below I have listed a few tips and hints I am going to put into practice when it comes to handling conflicts. 1. Remain calm, confrontation can be stressful and boost anxiety, but nothing productive will come from acting on emotion (you only need to be escorted out of your office building one time to learn this lesson). 2. Don’t get defensive; whether you believe the confrontation is just or not, becoming overtly defensive signals that you are uncooperative and dismissive of your confronter’s concern. 3. Instead ask this one question WHY? ex.) Tell me why you don’t think I am a team player?  Why do you believe I sold outside of my territory?  Why are you feeling misled by my email?  Can you tell me why is my performance is subpar? Asking "why" is a universal comeback that accomplish 2 things for you: 4. Hopefully your confrontation was just a misunderstanding or miscommunication that was resolved with a simple explanation, BUT on the off chance you really did make poor decision, mistake, misstep, error, blunder, etc., admit it, take responsibility, thank your confronter for bringing it to your attention, accept the consequences and most importantly learn from it. Much like confrontation, mistake making is an innate, unavoidable part of life. Embrace it, to quote my mom quoting, Oprah quoting, Maya Angelou “When you know better you do better.”  Now that you have tackled conflict, click the button below to download the free whitepaper on Building a Powerful Attitude for Sales [![Click me](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/53724/d9cde521-e9b5-4e81-92f6-7b70b91fd2de.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/53724/d9cde521-e9b5-4e81-92f6-7b70b91fd2de) [Not Your Average Role-Play](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/bid/84318/Not-Your-Average-Role-Play) [The 3 Ways Your Leads Are Finding You](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/bid/84440/The-3-Ways-Your-Leads-Are-Finding-You) ### About Author ![Codie Lynn Thompson](https://www.salesprogress.com/hubfs/New_Website/female_icon.png) Codie Lynn Thompson Related Posts ![Revolutionize Coaching: Embrace AI as a Partner for Greater Impact](https://www.salesprogress.com/hubfs/Revolutionize%20Coaching%20AI.jpg) [Revolutionize Coaching: Embrace AI as a Partner for Greater Impact](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/revolutionize-coaching-embrace-ai-as-a-partner-for-greater-impact) [Employee Development](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/employee-development), [Coaching Techniques](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-techniques), [leadership development](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/leadership-development), [AI](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/ai), [coaching tool](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-tool), [artificial intelligence](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/artificial-intelligence), [AI Coaching Partners](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/ai-coaching-partners) ![NEW Coaching Method Saves Time: Asynchronous Coaching](https://www.salesprogress.com/hubfs/Cadence%20Coaching-%20Asynchronous.jpg) [NEW Coaching Method Saves Time: Asynchronous Coaching](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/new-coaching-method-saves-time-asynchronous-coaching) [coaching](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching), [coaching conversation](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-conversation), [Coaching Techniques](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-techniques), [career development](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/career-development), [career coaching](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/career-coaching), [cadence](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/cadence), [asynchronous](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/asynchronous) ![Unlock Your Professional Growth: Mastering the OAT Principle](https://www.salesprogress.com/hubfs/Unlock%20OAT%20.jpg) [Unlock Your Professional Growth: Mastering the OAT Principle](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/unlock-your-professional-growth-mastering-the-oat-principle) [coaching method](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-method), [Employee Development](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/employee-development), [coaching skills](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-skills), [learning project](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/learning-project), [journal](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/journal), [self-awareness](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/self-awareness), [coaching framework](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/coaching-framework), [observation](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/observation), [oat](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/oat), [OAT Principle](https://www.salesprogress.com/progress-coaching-blog/tag/oat-principle) ### Leave a Reply ### Subscribe to the Progress Coaching Blog ### Posts by Topic - 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